Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham, part 6

Previously: Rahul made a rash promise, and Anjali was very loud.

In Naina's convertible, Rahul clasps his hands before him and says, "Main hoon na?" Naina's not having any of it: "Oh shut up Rahul. You behaved very badly today." She keeps scolding him over his insincere apology. "You didn't eat, dance, or even talk to anyone at the party tonight." I agree with Naina; it's one thing to get bored when a party's lame, it's quite another to bring the lame in with you. However, she ruins her good work by blatantly fishing for a compliment. "You didn't even tell me how beautiful I look tonight."

Rahul's already got the door open, but he turns to point his finger at her. "Um, you look very beautiful, Naina." The pleased smile dawns. "Really? How sweet." Sap. He nods. "I'm sweet... and I'm a good liar." Yeah, you know what's funny? When you kind of get a girl to think you like her, and you're not that into her, but you're just leading her on because your families are friends and no one better's caught your fancy yet. Even funnier is to make sure you keep any confidence on her part from growing by telling her she's not all that pretty, either. Just in case, you know, she started to think about moving on.

Naina gapes at Rahul in disbelief, then hisses, "Just go." "No," he replies, because now she wants him to leave and he can't have that. "Hey, Naina. You look very beautiful." "Are you lying or telling the truth?" she asks, not without reason. "What do you think?" "I think..." She looks way too sultry, there's no way she means this. "What do you think?" "I think, Rahul..." "What do you think, Naina?" "Rahul, I think you should go now." Yeah, too little too late, not that he cares, yelling, "I was lying you know!" as she screeches out of the driveway.

In the house, Rohan and Yash are playing Trivial Pursuit. Nandini and Daadi sit on the couch doing womanfolk stuff. Rahul comes in and sits at his mother's feet. "Hey Baba, hey Mom, Daadi-ma," he greets them, then throws a nut at Rohan. "Fatty!" "Daaaad!" whines Rohan, and Yash gives a half-hearted remonstrance. I mean, really, when you think about it? Rohan deserves to be tormented because of his weight. Just 'cause it's there. "What are you doing?" Rahul asks his mother.

"Nothing, except for planning Dad's surprise party," Rohan replies absent-mindedly, then gasps. Nandini and Daadi both make disgusted noises, and Nandini says, "Nothing stays in this boy's stomach," which I guess means he can't keep anything secret and instantly results in me picturing a fountain of vomit exiting Rohan's mouth. Gross, Nandini. "That's because you already put so much in there," Rahul replies. Fat jokes never stop being funny! At least till their objects buy Kalashnikovs!

"How was the party?" Nandini asks. Rahul says society parties bahut boring hai, and I bet I'd agree if I'd ever been invited to one, but since my last ten parties involved Hello Kitty cupcakes and at least one screaming fit on the part of the honoree I'll just take his word for it.

"Achcha? In that case you didn't take after your father," she replies. I like this, because it shows how she's completely forgotten he was adopted. "Because your papa used to love going to those parties..." He grunts in acknowledgment next to the fire. Nandini leans over Rahul's shoulder and murmurs, "So he could look at all the pretty girls who were there." "Nandini," Yash says, embarrassed. "Looking at those girls used to make your papa very happy," she adds. Yash replies, "But, Nandini ji, if I hadn't been looking at those beautiful girls, how would I have found you?" Awww!

Daadi throws a wet blanket on that sentiment. "What did you do? Your father brought Nandini's proposal." Turning to Rahul, she continues, "When your grandfather got his first look at her, he was very pleased. He said he approved. But he also said we'd have to discuss dowry. He insisted that the girl should bring from her father's house tons of love and," turning to regard Yash's height, which even sitting is evident, "A long, long ladder." Everyone dutifully laughs, and it is cute, although this is probably the millionth time they've heard the story if Daadi is anything like my daadi. "It's a good tradition. The elders of the house choose their daughter-in-law. You can't trust these crazy kids."

That last is punctuated by a nudge on Rahul's shoulder. He just laughs at her, but Nandini disagrees. "No, Mata ji, that was then. These days, everything is different." Just to prove how far along women have progressed, she rises to put Yash's teacup by his elbow, as he interjects, "Nothing's changed, Nandini." She turns, surprised, her smile fading a little. "Ji, today kids make their choices on their own..." He raises his head, gives her a look all the more scary for its mild implacability, and repeats, "Nothing's changed, Nandini." Now she's getting flustered. "What I meant was--" Because she's just not getting it, Yash decides to try repeating himself slowly, as one does to the mentally challenged or very small children. "Nothing... has... changed." "Ji, woh--" she tries, one last time, and now I'm getting embarrassed for her. Yash cuts her off one last time. "Didn't I speak? Enough. I've spoken."

Nandini stands there, humiliated, adjusting her pallu just so her hands have something to do, staring at Yash because there's nowhere else she's allowed to look. Rahul moves into frame behind her, and the camera shifts focus from her downcast gaze to his sympathetic concern. Lata hums the "Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham" refrain acapella.

The next day. Rukhsar's sitting on her windowsill daydreaming. Anjali can't allow a moment of silence to pass unbroken, so she brings over a tray of nuts and starts singing “Meri Bindiya Teri Nindiyan," from Lamhe, except of course it's "teri bindiya uski nindiyan" in this rendition. Rukhsar's a little embarrassed and tells her to shut up. "You shut up!" Anjali answers. "Where is your Ashfaque miya?" Can someone tell me why it's "miya" on the end of his name? I'd be eternally grateful, because it's bugged me for two years now or something. "Introduce him to me, let me take a look at him!" Rukhsar's ready for this. "He's coming from Lucknow today, and he'll come to meet you as soon as he gets here." She keeps her eyes shyly downcast while she says it, but Anjali's not fooled. "Quit acting like the coy bride. What's he do for a living?" "He's a poet," Rukhsar replies, and because poetry has long been known as a source of steady income, they both look happy about this.

"I'll get along well with him; I'm something of a poet myself," Anjali brags. Daijaan and Rukhsar roll their eyes and invite "Ustad Anjali Ali Khan" to make a fool of herself in verse form. To prove herself, Anjali recites, "What heartache have I gone through for thee/At one end is Rukhsar and at the other is Auntie!" That...sounds a lot less digestive in Hindi, I bet. They call her a brat and then, apropos of nothing, Daijaan offers the observation that her boss' picture is in the paper today, along with his son's. Anjali demands a look, but Daijaan orders her to wash her hands first. So that the ink will come off more noticeably on her fingers? Maybe Daijaan wants to cut it out and frame it because she doesn't see enough of them during her 18-hour work days.

Daijaan expositions that tomorrow's Yash's fiftieth birthday party and it's going to be huge, and oh, by the way, be sure to have a ton of sweets ready because I told them you'd provide them from your father's shop. Advance notice! It's overrated! So don't screw it up. Anjali's not so sure, since tomorrow's her father's birthday too. Daijaan tells her to just come to Yash's party a little late. Anjali would never of thought of such a complicated solution on her own, so she's ecstatic. Daijaan's distracted by an impending migraine, though, and Anjali swipes the paper, then runs out the door to join "the gang" dancing in the streets while shouting at Rukhsar to remember to send Ashfaque over as soon as he arrives.

Rahul screeches to a halt in his red convertible, with Rohan turning his nose up at the hoi polloi in the passenger seat. "This is so down-market, bhaiyya," he complains, looking like a refugee from L.A. in his Gap sweatshirt and shades. He waves his hand in front of his nose. Rahul, sporting a blindingly white suit, calls him a brat, and for once I'm on Rahul's side. He leaves Rohan and goes to deliver some medicine from his mother to Daijaan. Hey, try not to get kidnapped or robbed, kid! Survival of the fittest and all that, plus it's not like your dad's a gazillionaire and you could get held for ransom or anything.

In the square, a bunch of bhangra-sporting Sikhs are playing and dancing, and Anjali's right in the middle of the party. I love to watch Kajol dance; I have no way of judging her technical expertise but she brings such joie de vivre that it's impossible not to smile. Inside, poor Daijaan's trying to sleep despite the racket. Rahul enters with the medicine. Rukhsar, flustered, tries to rise, but he stops her and mimes about the medicine so exaggeratedly that I wonder why he didn't just yell. He leaves without Daijaan ever seeing him.

Outside, Rahul descends the stairs to the same square where Kajol's dancing, but she's obscured behind turbans and drums. He's smiling about the music, tapping his hand on the banister to the rhythm, and then he catches a glimpse of Anjali's braid. Peering through the whirling bodies, he descends more slowly, and then... the crowd parts and there's Anjali and she looks like this:


and Rahul is so screwed, and this time he knows it. So does the incidental music, because the drums disappear and instead we get some string music and a woman singing "sanjanaaaaaaaa" while the choir "ah ah ah ah AH ah ah ah ah ah"s and Anjali bounces in slow motion.

He's so busy staring that he promptly trips and tumbles down the last three stairs, barely staying upright--hee--then regains his balance and stares some more. She's exuberant and brash and excited and whirling like a dervish, having the time of her life out where everyone can see her, completely unrestrained--she's everything he's never had and didn't know he wanted, till just now. Just in case we were wondering what Karan wants, we get an EXTREME CLOSE-UP of SRK's eyes, blinking once, in the moment Rahul falls completely head-over-heels.

Then the bhangra returns, the music spins out to a high-energy finish, Bauji calls from the store, and Anjali's gone, just like that.

Next up: Rohan's a laddoo, and Anjali's a dead duck. Yummy!